Many years ago I decided to stop dying my hair, wearing earrings, and generally trying to stop doing things I felt were causing me to appear or think of myself as a unique and special snowflake. This was a reaction to two things; mental health and Buddhist Dharma.
This is not to say Buddhist teachings say not to do those things, this is to say that my reaction to my understanding of the teachings of Buddha mixed with my own mental health at a given time were to decide to, what I can only paraphrase as; stop being different.
I didn’t realize that I actually shaved my hair, took out my earrings and stopped doing a lot of specific types self expression for a very long time (I still haven’t put any earrings back in) due to not realizing I wasn’t “being different” or being “strange”. I’m actually perfectly normal and that’s how I express myself.
That’s such a legit sentence. “I’m actually perfectly normal and that’s how I express myself.”
I just wrote that twice and I still don’t think I actually believe it but, I sure want to. When I started this post the subtitle was “Stop being different”. I’m trying here… Get off my back me! :)
Now that I know so many of my decisions were based on flawed assumptions I’m going to try to figure out who I am I guess… Wish me luck!